ear to ear

ethan has been asking for a quite some time to start playing baseball. we decided that this is a good season to start. he is playing in our city t-ball little league. his love for this game is crazy. he literally smiles from ear to ear when he is on the field. he throws well. he hits well. he could use some catching practice... but over all he is pretty good. and more importantly, he loves it. it brings me such tremendous happiness and huge smiles to see him enjoying this so much... i sure hope this gives him some needed boosts... it's a pat on the back that i can't give to him. it's that sense of accomplishment. that sense of belonging. the sportsmanship.

as parents we should know and accept that we can't possibly give our children everything they need to be successful in life. they need experiences and other people to provide those learning and growing opportunities. those situations with his peers to teach him how to interact. this is one of those for ethan. he needs this to help him grow into the man he is to become.

i got some shots of him batting... he is adorable. i will keep you updated on his season and how the angels are doing!!!

tracy

i have listened to Tracy Chapman since days with amber roskelley. and i had never heard this one, or it never stood out to me before this night. i was in the car friday night with someone and heard this song for the first time. it was overwhelming, the emotion i felt when i heard this song. i actually teared up and attempted to hide it. all i said outloud was that it was a sweet song. i came home and listened to it. and then all day saturday i listened to it every opportunity i got. i cried a couple times. listened some more... it's such a good song. it touched a very tender spot in my heart... enjoy these lyrics... and listen to the song. she is just amazing!

ps. i will wait for you. i do miss you. please come fill the space that's reserved for you in my heart. im waiting... im watching and im wishing you were here...

THE PROMISE
By: Tracy Chapman

If you wait for me then I'll come for you
Although I've traveled far
I always hold a place for you in my heart
If you think of me If you miss me once in awhile
Then I'll return to you
I'll return and fill that space in your heart

Remembering
Your touch
Your kiss
Your warm embrace
I'll find my way back to you
If you'll be waiting

If you dream of me like I dream of you
In a place that's warm and dark
In a place where I can feel the beating of your heart

Remembering
Your touch
Your kiss
Your warm embrace
I'll find my way back to you
If you'll be waiting

I've longed for you and I have desired
To see your face your smile
To be with you wherever you are

Remembering
Your touch
Your kiss
Your warm embrace
I'll find my way back to you
If you'll be waiting

I've longed for you and I have desired
To see your face, your smile
To be with you wherever you are

Remembering
Your touch
Your kiss
Your warm embrace
I'll find my way back to you
Please say you'll be waiting

Together again
It would feel so good to be
In your arms
Where all my journeys end
If you can make a promise
If it's one that you can keep,
I vow to come for you
If you wait for me and say you'll hold
A place for me in your heart.

random happenings...

so. i wrote this out during a moment, a sandra moment. hahaha...

we have all said or heard at some point "everything happens for a reason". it sounds so cliche. until the other day, it hit me... it made sense, in a different way. everything absolutely does happen for a reason. we are offered jobs, people die, kids get sick, people we love get married, marriages end, old friends find us, tragedy, victory... etc...

we cannot control the things that "happen" to or around us. we can control how we apply those things to our lives. we choose what we do with these things.

that old friend found their way back into your life, what are you going to do with it????

someone that you could fall in love with has offered you their heart, what are you going to do with it???

you are jobless, what do you choose to do with it?

i could go on and on, like always, i just find that big opportunities come in and out of our lives... and if we wait too long, the opportunity may not be there. but if we jump too quickly without thinking, it could be a bad situation. such a fine line. i have learned not to let good opportunities pass me by. i have learned that saying what i need to say is important. but filtering it and not letting all thoughts loose is important as well. i have learned that i cant bulldoze through situations. i have learned that i am not always right and have learned to open up to hearing another side and considering that it may be right, or better. i have learned to not be so prideful and self righteous. i have learned that the people i trust and care about, their opinions are very important to me. i have learned that i can care deeper than i thought possible.

see. i just went on a tangent. hahahaha.... one thought led to another, and on to another... hahaha...

i choose to invest in the good things and people that come into my life. i choose to filter the bad opportunities and thoughts out of my life. i work on the ability to diagnose a situation as good or bad, accurately. i choose to make the best out of the things that "happen" to me. i choose to rise above. and i choose to be happy!!!!

normal

as we go through life, we discover "normal". we think others were raised the same way we were. we think that circles of friends function the same as ours. we think others are similar or the same to us, because it's what we have learned as "normal". it feels as though after we find our normal (which is a discovery process all on it's own)... we at some point, then realize that our normal, is abnormal to everyone else. and that we are all unique and distinctly different than our own "normal". some realize this at a very young age... and others, it takes quite a while... but part of growing up and maturing is realizing this concept. but even bigger than that concept is learning to accept, love and embrace those differences as learning experiences and opportunities to cultivate growth. and loving those people because they are different and they have so much to offer to our plate.

i have not always been so good with this. i have learned more recently in my life that differences are the reason this world is so colorful. and so beautiful. as i grow to love, and strengthen the love with the people i am close to, because they are different and i attempt to see things from their "normal" perspective, i am strengthened, i learn, and my mind is opened. my definition of love expands. and the word love means more to me than it did previously. i have learned that part of unconditional love is allowing the people i love to make decisions for themselves, love them and support them. all the time remembering that i would handle a situation differently than them, and their way is not wrong, it's just different.

i want to be a better person. i want to be more compassionate and understand more fully the differences in the people around me. i want to broaden my view of "normal" and allow others "normal" into my mind and heart. i want to learn more about the people i am close to and allow myself to embrace their thoughts, more openly than i have been doing so. i want to open myself up to give more and soak up the amazingness of them!!!

more than satisfactory

so little man brought home his preschool report card...

they do full evaluations of those kids. eliot is receiving the best possible "grades" in preschool. he identifies all his capital and lowercase letters. he recognizes the sounds of all 26 letters. all of his pre-reading stuff. his handwritting stuff. his numbers and geometry. his teacher's comments were "eliot is doing great. we love having him in our class".

this is his writting sample that was attached to his report card. and then behind that is all his letters written out. it's just amazing how much the kid knows... his knowledge combined with his sweet gentle spirit... he is going to be an amazing man!!!! i am grateful for him.

just a little click

eryn is a little princess. she is very girlie. and enjoys most "girlie" activities. painting nails, makeup, jewelry, doing hair, dressing up... so on and so on... (hahahaha... so not me, it's so funny). so we thought it would be cool for eryn to get her ears pierced. she has asked when she was going to be able to wear earrings like brittany... so, it was a good 8th birthday and baptism gift... oh. no. she's growing up!!!

anyhow we went to the mall... eryn was good until she looked up at me and said "mommy, i need to go to the bathroom". we all kinda laughed and realized that she was probably a little nervous. so britt took her to the restroom while rachel and i filled out paperwork...

before she climbed up into the official ear piercing chair, she had us all feel her heart that was jumping out of her chest. she then took position and a couple tears fell. the employee cleaned the lobe and brought the marking pen up to eryn's ear and she pulled away. so we started walking her through the process. britt explained to her that it was going to make her ears feel hot. rachel kept telling her that it doesn't hurt. it's just a little click in your ear. she had herself all worked up. it didn't help that little brothers were concerned about her and trying to hold her legs and her hands. the girl had to do one ear at a time because they only had one girl on duty. i went over to her side and held her hand... they did the right ear first and i think she was kind of shocked that it didn't hurt. then she sat good for the left ear. it was done.

she admitted that we were all right with our descriptions of how it doesn't hurt, how it's hot, and it's a little click in her ear and that she would be okay.

britt then told us that eryn explained that her fear was that she was going to move when they were about to pierce her ear and she would have a hole in her ear where one didn't belong... she's funny.

so she has beautiful little earrings. i have attached the video that she sent to my mom showing off her ears...